G.I.N.A.S.F.S.

"Homophobic language isn't always meant to be hurtful, but how often do you use it without thinking?"

The Institute for Sexual Minority Studies and Services at the University of Alberta in Canada has set up a website called NoHomophobes.com, which monitors the use of casual homophobic slurs on Twitter. The figures are astounding. (To me, anyway.)

The website has three tabs; Today, Last Week, and All Time. The numbers are collected on the website in real time, so you can actually refresh the page and watch the figures climb.


Between March 7th and March 13th (ie Last Week), the word 'faggot' was used in a tweet/tweets 322,576 times. The phrase 'so gay' was used 77,878 times.

In the count for Today, 'faggot' had been used 31, 419 times at the time of writing this blog.*


From the NoHomophobes.com website: "Words and phrases like “faggot,” “dyke,” “no homo,” and “so gay” are used casually in everyday language, despite promoting the continued alienation, isolation and — in some tragic cases — suicide of sexual and gender minority (LGBTQ) youth."

* I'm not sure how the 'Today' count interacts with world time zones. 3.22pm in Brisbane is 11pm in Edmonton, Alberta, but the fact that this number might represent a whole day rather than a partial day doesn't exactly make it better.

This is the story about the time I got second-hand Facebook stalked

This is the story about the time I got second-hand Facebook stalked.

It was my joint birthday party and I was with a bunch of friends at Alfred and Constance. It was about 8pm at night and we were surrounded by a crowd of people celebrating hen’s nights, 30^th birthdays and Saturday nights. A girl I had never met before came up to me while I was talking to a guy friend. She was in a pretty cotton dress with a crown of flowers and a badge that screamed ‘BRIDE’. The conversation went something like this:

Bride-to-be: Hi. Is he single?

Me: No.

Bride-to-be: Are you single?

Me: No. But he is. (point to single male friend)

Bride-to-be: Wait – I know you. Did you used to date Jim*?

Me: Urm…yes.

Bride to be: You’re Sarah*!

Me: No, Sarah is his sister. He wouldn’t date Sarah. I’m B.

Slightly worrying bride-to-be: Ah, ok, sorry. Jim’s sort of potentially dating a friend of mine.

Me: Yes, he is my ex. Definitely ex. 

Bride-to-be with no concept of social boundaries: I’d love to hear the back-story behind that!

… expectant, eager face stares into horrified, ‘can’t believe you just asked me that’ face …

Me: NO.

Friend next to me chimes in: You see, it’s B’s birthday, she really doesn’t want to talk about her ex.

Bride-to-be with no concept of social boundaries: Oh, ok. It’s my hen’s night tonight.

Expectant pause.

Me: It’s my birthday.

Bride-to-be with no concept of social boundaries: Ok, bye.

*stony silence

I was in shock from that conversation for quite a while. Let’s get a few things clear:

This girl, whom I had never met before, recognised me from Facebook photos of me with my ex-boyfriend. That’s how many photos of the two of us she looked at, presumably while ‘researching’ him as a potential date for her friend. I got second-hand Facebook stalked.

Secondly, having met me, this girl thought it was the perfect opportunity to do a bit of first-hand investigating and find out about my relationship and break-up with Ex, presumably for any juicy details or dark secrets, like if he cheated on me (which he did not).

Why, in any god’s name, would she think that I would discuss the private matters of my most recent and painful break up with a complete stranger whom I met at a bar while celebrating my birthday? She genuinely looked so expectant and excited when she wanted to hear ‘the back story’, anticipating that I was about to spill everything.

I’ve had a lot of people say strange things to me and I have had a lot of very odd conversations. I am not usually stumped for something to say, but a loud and indignant ‘NO’ was the only word I could manage in this situation. I’m sure if I had been more forthcoming, there would have been subsequent questions and a full-on grilling session would have ensued.

If I met the ex of someone I or a friend was dating, it would never cross my mind to ask them about their break-up. Would you? Would you question the ex to find out if someone is good enough to date your friend? 

Dear Bride-to-be, I don’t know who you were but you might want to tone it down when you’re out in public. You were creepy. I hope you had a fun night after the scaring innocent people incident. 


*fake names 

The success and sexiness of business cards

When I got my first professional job out of university I was pretty damn excited. There was a whole lot to get excited about; a higher salary, not having to pull coffee for 8 hours a day and these mythical things called 'weekends'.

All of my initial excitement paled in comparison to how excited I was to get my first ever business cards. Here, on a small card was proof that I had arrived. I was a marketer. I was in business. My friends were all equally excited even though there was no one to give our cards to except for friends and family as proof of a job obtained and ‘if you ever need to contact me’. As if we were suddenly going to start calling landlines again.

Now, a few different business cards later, it’s less exciting. Because what I want now is a personal business card. Kind of like Daniel Ocean, I want some sort of super-sweet card to casually flick at people I meet socially. I want it to be snazzy and sexy and say everything they need to know about me in one beautifully designed rectangle.

IF I were to get such a thing, the pressing issue becomes: what do I put on it?

• Name, obviously. Nickname as well?
• Email address
• Blog title and url
• Twitter name – because that ain’t changing anytime soon and I’m too addicted to give it up.

Now it gets murky:

• Phone number – probably yes, but not an automatic yes.
• Linkedin – though they could probably guess this is the wanted to.
• Descriptor. Definitely have to have one but thinking up the best list will be the tough part. What to include or leave off? On twitter I have: 

Bookworm, attemptive blogger, traveller, big eater, wine lover and morning person. Working in philanthropy, not a philanthropist.
  
…but that seems a little long, What to include? Do you put the ‘profession’ you’re aiming for or what to promote? Or do you stick with the truth?

• Source of amusement – I can’t be the only person who’d like to see business cards with pithy one liners. I’d like there to be something amusing on my business card, as a reflection of my personality. Make for a conversation starter if nothing else.

B

Charming hostess, writer, squirrel lover. Opinions are always my own.

Style from the suburbanintellect.blogspot.com.au

T: birgit_w

Etc.

See how much there is to think about? This is without even considering design.

Does anyone else wish they had ‘personal’ business cards? If so, what would you put on them?

Five for Friday no. 29

Dressing like social media. I'm so traditional - I'd choose from Facebook, Twitter or YouTube.

 'facebook'. Image courtesy of B for Bel.

A girlfriend of mine shared this around last Friday so I thought I would pass it on. A song for Friday.

 

The beauty of the Stockholm Subway. I miss living in a city with a subway. 
 

 

 Image courtesy of This Art is Yours.

L.A. as a film map.

The cutest things that ever happened. Do not open unless you have spare time and a supply of 'awwww'.

 

So, I'm a Twitter fan. Not an obsessive fan, just a fan. I got into it for work and then socially,now I tweet most days ... this is starting to sound like an addication but really, it's not. As a social platform Twitter is fun and useful and revolutionising communication while being the new ultimate time-waster. It can be an interesting place to 'hang out' and a lot of the cool things I talk about on this blog I find directly or indirectly through Twitter. I have even posted an info-graphic on Twitter [I love info-graphics].

What I am posting about today is the yearly round-up of Twitter. The twitter-powers-that-be are slowly releasing their year in review, with lists of the most trending topics, which note-able people joined and also interesting news stories that have a basis or tie with Twitter. My favourite was this story of a guy in Portland, Oregon who saved his Mum's bookstore with one tweet. It's kind of amazing story and you can either watch it just below or read about it and other Twitterworld stories online. There are also cool facts like the most tweets sent in one second - which wasn't for the moment Brasil were eliminated from the Copa America, though at 7,166 tweets it came close - or that #Eygpt was the most used hastag all year, and that Charlie Sheen, who only joined Twitter in March 2011 was the most talked about actor. Twitter - it's not just about meaningless drivel.

Zombie Belle

The internet is a strange zone of a space and it causes one to make strange bedfellows and discover penchants one never thought one had.

I confessed a while ago to my shameful Tumblr addiction of Disney Princess. Last week I started being followed on Twitter by Design Taxi. There is seemingly no connection between these two – except there is.

Months ago I saw these illustrations on Disney Princess and I thought they were just so damn cool, It wasn't until I checked out Design Taxi today that I could put a name to them. They're the gorgeous work of Jeffrey Thomas.

Disney Princesses as you've never seen them, by Jeffrey Thomas, featured on Design Taxi.